Black belieber.

See how driven people are to prove their talents.

So stop hatin.

Pfttt...

By the way, are they brothers?




Dem yuh!

Rediscover purpose

This is somehow unplanned. I am in the middle of a really hectic schedule, and this week especially is the most intense week for me. Everything I have been doing since January this year, will come to the climax; a project I am involved since day one in 2008: Eco Film Fest.

Last night I was at the Green Drinks event at The Apartment KLCC, a last-Tuesday-of-the-month event where budding environmental-conscious people gather to, drink. In fact, we (the Team) were lucky to be given a slot to to promote our final EFF2011.

After the event started we got out to KLCC to find something less overpriced to eat. Half an hour after that we walked back to the event. Just in front of the Apartment entrance, I bumped into an old friend (if I'm considered a friend), my former schoolmate. I remembered I saw her status update in some social media platform a while ago when she just got married and everyone was congratulating her and stuff. She was with her husband, and my, she's pregnant. We chatted for couple of minutes and she asked me, "do you still work for the motorsports-thingy stuff?" and I answered, "no, I'm now doing environmental education stuff. Close to four years now." A moment later we made our own way.

The highlight of the story was not meeting an old friend, but rather the fact that I have been doing environmental work for four years. I came a long way; volunteer, part time, executive, and now, the Programme Manager.

And for so long I have done a stretch of things, extending beyond just environment. I write for my blog, I learn music, I lecture, I travel, I play, I party, I everything, in the name of self-development.

However after a while, I got too attached to my works, slowly sunken in the delusional fact that the only reason we all work is for money. Nothing is working without money. My self-development went down the gutter.

And funny, just now, in fact this past month, I've been getting few comments by people I know and I don't: We don't see your writing anymore.

God, a hobby I explored out of realising how crucial it is for my future benefit, was left noticed. Last time I felt like I have the need, the responsibility to write, but now, down the gutter.

It also made me realised how I missed writing; a simple, cheap fun to entertain myself and sometimes, for better or worse, I entertained (or annoyed) others. A hobby which I used to spend seriously to develop and train my honest opinions and thinking process which involves 90% of the time pure bullcrap. Craps take a lot of effort too.

Maybe I was caught in the heat of the moment. We grow older, our drive, our strength, our youthful charm, declining while on the contrary, the world demands more from us; more work, more money, more products.

So is this all worthwhile? The chase for money - something imaginary and feel so damn real?

It made me think that what I need to do is to think of what made me feel happy, what I feel good about, without compromising my commitments and responsibilities. I need to rediscover the purpose of life, my life.

So what I'll do is, I'll start to write again. Or at least pay more attention to my belongings.

Allow me to welcome myself back.


Dem yuh!

Hilang.

Seperti hujan hilang awan
Seperti hilang arah tujuan

Seperti irama hilang lagu
Seperti hilang suara merdu

Seperti tawa hilang riang
Seperti hilang bayang-bayang

Seperti malam hilang pengganti
Seperti hilang di siang hari

Seperti suria hilang cahaya
Seperti hilang bulan purnama

Seperti cinta hilang jiwa
Seperti hilang dipandangan mata

Seperti dunia hilang perisa
Seperti hilang di mata dunia

Seperti nyawa hilang hati
Seperti hilang kasih abadi

Semuanya indah
Dan semuanya hilang

Quote of the day.

Kawan lama tak jumpa.

kring-kring...

kring-kring...

Gua tengok nombor yang tak dikenali.

"Helo?"

"Wei bro, ru surah sampai mana?"

Gua masih tak berapa cam dengan pelat ala-ala Jepun mamat yang telipon gua tu.

"Siapa ni?", musykil.

"Ru surah tak ingat sama gua ka bro?", nadanya macam hampa.

"Oki?", gua teka-teka saja.

"Hahaha ya bro ya! Ru masih ingat sama gua...", pulak gua dengar suara Oki macam sebak-sebak gembira.

Gua masih rilek. Lama juga tak jumpa Oki.

"Bro, gua tau ru punya birthday hari Isnin, itu pasal gua gua datang inni harriii mau cerebrate sama rruuuu!"

"Okeh, lu tunggu gua kat sana Oki. Gua dah on the way, lagi seploh menit gua sampei."

"Gua caya sama rruuuu!" Oki jerit ala-ala David Arumugam punya 'trimaseyyy!' yang merupakan kegilaan Oki sejak kecil.

Gua sentuh skrin iPhone gua untuk memotong perbualan.

"Siapa tu?", tanya Shaq, sepupu gua.

"Oki, kawan lama gua."

Suasana dalam kereta Shaq kembali hening.

*******

Suasana sangat gamat. Beribu manusia macam-macam fesyen ada. Semua demi melihat kehebatan Oki di atas pentas.

Gua nampak kelibat seorang mamat berambut panjang, berbaju tanpa lengan, seluar hitam ketat dan kasut hi-top yang agak ranggi naik pentas.

Jeritan manusia-manusia ini makin galak bagai kena rasuk pontianak bila kelibat Oki muncul di atas pentas.

Oki! Oki! Oki! Oki! Oki!

Gua sengih sorang-sorang. Tak sangka lu dah semakin ramai peminat Oki. Tak sia-sia lu lari rumah, merantau sampai ke negara penjajah, akhirnya lu berjaya juga cipta nama.

*******

Jam Nixon yang dah lama gua tak pakai sebab tunggu nak ganti tali dia sikit punya lama menunjukkan hampir tiga pagi.

Nak kena chow ni, gua agak.

"Shaq, gua nak turun bawah kejap, nak jumpa kawan gua. Lepas tu kita chow, oke?"

Shaq angguk sambil tunjuk tanda 'ibu jari ke atas'.

Gua jalan perlahan dalam kegelapan yang bersilih ganti lampu perbagai warna, menuju ke arah pentas, gelanggang Oki menunjuk taring.

Gua pandang tepat ke arah Oki bila gua dah berada betul-betul di depan pentas.

"OKI!!!" jerit gua, mencuba menenggelamkan jeritan hiruk-pikuk ribuan yang lain.

Oki tersentap, semacam terdengar satu suara yang amat familiar. Oki terus menoleh ke kanannya.

Tanpa berlengah, Oki terus meluru ke arah gua.

"BRRROOOO!!!" Jerit Oki sambil memegang mikrofon. Satu dewan bergema. Yang lain makin dirasuk.

"Rama gua tarak jumpa sama rruuu! Ru apa khabarrrr??!", sambil dia menghulur tangan kepada gua, minta berjabat.

Gua sambut huluran salam Oki, kawan lama gua.

"Baguslah Oki, lu sudah berjaya. Gua tumpang gembira.", gua terpaksa jerit sebab bising sangat.

"Tapi karau bukan kerana nasihat dan sokongan ru, gua takkan berjaya sampai sekarang..."

"A man makes his own destiny, Oki."

"Thank you bro.", kata Oki sambil tahan airmata daripada meleleh.

Oki pusing ke kiri dan terus sapu bawah mata, cover line daripada dilihat oleh peminat-peminat lain.

"I'M IN THE HOUSE!", Oki laungkan dan terus melambai tangan kepada peminat yang fanatik.

Gua pusing, terus chow.

Dem yuh!

There's Something About... AVATAR.

I know this is rather late. But just read guys, it's different.

Last time I read about a month ago, while Avatar was hiking up at #4 for all-time worldwide box office with USD$1.02 billion, the film was not even screened in China, yet.
*Note: China has about 16,000 cinemas.

Now the film is at the top of the chart with USD$2.04 billion gross, exactly 100% more from last month, and counting. If we look at a simple math, cinemas in China contribute half of the ticket sales worldwide. Crazy, isn't it?

James Cameron, the man behind the film, made history with two of his films sitting on the reign of Top 5 All-Time Highest Grossing Films, respectively #2, and #1. Bloody hell. The last time he directed a studio film was the very jiwang-karat-tahap-Celine-Dion-punya-jiwang, Titanic. That was 1997, about what, 13 years ago?

How much you think he's getting from Titanic and Avatar each? If I'm being silly and say he gets 5% of the total gross for Titanic, and 10% for Avatar (he wrote the script and directed the film, plus he uses most of his resources - CGI lab, crews, blah blah blah), well, some math,

5% x USD1.8b = USD$90 million
+
10% x USD$2b = USD$200 million
=
USD$290 million

Simple math. Like I said, if I'm being silly and just picked some numbers from the air on how much money he's making. It's like,

hey bro, duit komisyen Titanic gua sudah mau kering lah. Gua nak kena buat filem lagi. Paiseh...

One simple question to all of you:

What would you do if you have USD$290 million?

How much is USD$290 million? Erkk, about RM1 billion ringgit.

I'm gonna start listing down yao!

*******

To those who are going crazy about Avatar, maybe you can birth your own so-called 'Avatar'. Watch this, it's a job well done.

*******

On a heavier note, read what Tun Dr. Mahathir Mohamad has to say about Avatar, and the conspiracy theories about September 11, 2001 Incident. You can also follow his blog HERE.


*******

Lastly, I can't help but to share something funny that I read from Hiddie's blog.

What do you think? Was it hard, or easy for James Cameron to come up with the talk-of-the-world Avatar?

"Good artists copy,
Great artists steal."
~Pablo Picasso

And if Picasso was still alive, what would he say about AVATAR?

I'm pretty damn sure he'd say,

Dem yuh!

Interesting facts about February 2010

What's with all the "4" there? Kinda creepy.


Dem yuh!

S_A_E

Hi, today I have something to s_a_e with all of you.

First, I will try and to be s_a_e about this.

When I was growing up earlier, I used to s_a_e. I stopped already now but I still watch the videos and read magazines about it. It’s really fun. But I think I got involved because I had a lot of s_a_e time. Unfortunately one day I broke my wrist while I was on it. Funny thing is, I always tell this story to my kid brother to s_a_e him from getting involved, plus he’s huge no way that thing can hold him up. Other than that, I like to play cards, especially the Big Two game. You know, where the lowest card is the Three of Diamond, and the highest is the Two of S_a_e. It is a fun card game.

Speaking of career, I have grown s_a_e on my jobs and I need a long vacation. I have no time for my extracurricular activities anymore. Maybe I need some s_a_e, maybe I don’t. I don't know myself. But whatever it is I need to find a s_a_e and see how much I have gained. Damn, I need to keep myself in s_a_e again. Protein s_a_e, get ready to work!

Sometimes, I even forgot to s_a_e. Well, my face of course. The other parts only when my girlfriend feels disturbed or distracted, otherwise I just let it grow.

Honestly, I don’t think human should work so hard like a s_a_e because at the end of the day we are still fighting and trying to make ends meet. We have to liberate ourselves, and live our lives to the fullest. But I know only a very few s_a_e the same idea like me. It is okay for me, I don't blame them. Some of us just learned from the different books.

Now, I wanna tell you about something that I hate. I hate s_a_e. It freaks me out. I know this is a s_a_e thing to tell. So, do not try to be funny with me if you can’t take my bitch-slap.

Lastly, life is like a play on a big s_a_e, with actors and props and music and plots and dramas. You can either stand there alone and s_a_e at everyone without doing anything to improve yourselves, or follow the storyline that has been given to you, or, you can be different. You raise a bigger s_a_e in the play, and let others follow your storyline.

Dem yuh!

Who is the real MAN?

I don't know why women really wants to be equal to men. I mean, yes I 100% agree that women should be treated and respected equally. And to have the fair amount of opportunity and chances to do what they wish to, and excel in whatever they do, and to pursue their happiness.

But, women want to be in the realm of men, yet they still act emotionally, often misjudge their conscience, and weep all the time. Well, I weep all the time too but I never want to be in the realm of women.

Please STOP hoping or expecting us to be like you; neat and tidy, organised, diet, smell good, SHAVED, sensitive, fussy and cute.

• Just let us have our own Poker Night or Boys Night Out at least once a month.
• Just let us mess around a little bit with the living room with snacks and drinks while watching football.
• Just let us wear scabbed jeans with crumpy tee when we go out.
• Just let us brag about our pastime as the football captain back in high school.
• Just let us with our scruffiness - means we don't have to shower two times a day, or shave every week.
• Just let us feed our sometimes undeserved ego, because we are MEN.
• Just let us take care of you ladies, even though we look like we don't seem to care, we can't live without WOMEN. We ACCEPTED that fact LONG AGO.

BOYS WILL ALWAYS BE BOYS.

I'm just sharing with those trapped in the same dilemma.

I ain't being sexist. I love women; I love my mother, my sisters, my aunties, my girlfriend. I love women in general. But ladies, please, just let your man WEAR THE PANTS.

Dem yuh!

Deactivated fantasy

Hey young world.

I deactivated my Facebook account, more than a week ago. I thought it's evil. Not the act of 'deactivating the Facebook', but Facebook per se, is evil.

Actually I've deactivated it a few times already. And I activate again, and back and forth, and back an forth. Just like smoking, you started because all your friends are talking about it and they are doing it because it's so cool and you can 'meet more people' and you'll be part of the 'coolness' so you joined. Then you got hooked up, you couldn't leave it for two seconds. You meet more and more 'people' and suddenly you are part of the 'society'. As time goes by, you realized it's not really healthy, so you stopped. Then after couple days of 'withdrawal symptoms' you gave up and you smoked again. It goes around for a few times. Most people just got sucked into the web and never came back.


I felt pathetic about myself. I had about 371 friends in that Facebook, but were all of them really my friends? And, when I deleted my account, no one even noticed. Not surprising. Oh, actually, only one person noticed :) Go figure.

I think it's really funny nowadays. Why? Because:

Fantasy
You don't have to actually meet someone physically to befriended with. Virtual sex is not entirely wrong, I guess?

Relationship Hell
Adding “in a relationship with” is like putting up a billboard that reads, “Please! Hit on my boyfriend!” or “Hey guys! Stalk my girlfriend!” I’m not kidding. For some reason, twisted people see the “relationship status” as an invitation to break it as quickly as possible.

Attention
It's the best place to get the undeserved attention that you want. You share everything in it. No privacy, no discretion, no nothing. I know many would disagree and say, "I can set my privacy levels and shit." Of course that kind of negates the point, doesn’t it? But truth is, I don't care anymore.

Drama
If you have a problem with your friend, why didn’t you just tell that person? Why whine about it in your status? With friends like that....

Applications
You can play all sorts of games and applications which you have no balls to do in real life. I have apps like everyone else, and some are fun. But some apps need to be destroyed forever. How many times can a zombie bite me? Will my friend hate me if I ignore his “Best Friends Forever” request?

Unwanted Friends
Sometimes it’s a person I deleted before. Sometimes it’s a person who deleted me and now wants to be my friend again. Ermm, you got rid of me. Why would I take you back? Worst of all are the times it’s a “friend” who just wants to spy on me for someone I deleted.

Stalkers
Unless your Facebook is set to be viewable by only your friends, someone is spying on you. Guaranteed. These pages are magnets for creeps who would rather watch you through the Internet than actually talk to you in person.

One PRICELESS example

I'm sure there's many more I can write down. I'm just not gonna.

I think it's better to smoke. At least you're doing something real and if you die you can say, "hey, smoking kills," than, "hey, Facebook kills."

I feel really, really sad now. Sad because I was once sucked into this evil thing.

Mark Zuckerberg is a BILLIONAIRE, at the age of what, 24? And what are we doing now? Playing Farmville? Mafia Wars? What type of kisser are you? When are you going to get married? How sexy are you?

Give me a break!

Oh my God, I am so stressed now. Sad, stressed. Add another one and I'll shoot myself in the head.

After writing all this, I really feel like vomiting. This time, I will stand strong and not go back to that monster. We are hopelessly addicted and it will be the end of our natural lives. I guarantee if we can make it 2 weeks without it, our lives will become better in every way. One more week to go...

Dem yuh!

Mental masturbation.

I received an SMS two nights ago from a friend whose apparently generous enough to have spent her time reading my 94% bullshits.

This is what she wrote to me in her SMS, in respond to my entry: Poseur? I believe the term pseudo-intellectual suits you better. I think I'm one of those too.

Self-explanatory

I laughed. Maybe I am. So I'll share with you guys a little bit about mental masturbation @ pseudo-intellectual.

Introduction: A pseudo intellectual (a term used by pseudo intellectual, instead of using a much simpler word, such as MORON) is someone who pretends to be smart, but who does not put in the work or have the actual brainpower to be considered smart.

Four signs of the pseudo-intellectual

1. Quoting
2. Going against common thought without evidence
3. Bringing up intellectualism in non-requisite situations
4. Unnecessary use of verbs and adjectives with four syllables or more

How can you tell a pseudo-intellectual?

1. One who attempts to flex intellect that does not exist within his or her own mind.
2. Can probably be found with a thesaurus in hand, while in a chat room, looking up new insults that are synonymous with "stupid" in order to boost his or her own undeserved ego.
3. Typical cases of pseudo-intellectualism involve prepubescent 15 year old that think they have everything figured out, including, but not limited to: philosophy, socioeconomic, destiny of humanity, life, religion, politics, education, and sex. Ironically, they have never quite experienced either of the aforementioned.
4. Acting "eccentric" to differentiate themselves from the masses as to seem unique, even though their kind are quite common. Then, they consistently criticizing Malaysia and its government and citizens and everything else in the country for no good reason, followed by the claim that they will move to Australia after. Someone who spends 40 minutes talking about how much they hate police, the military, the people and Malaysia in general. When asked a serious intellectual question they give a blank stare.
5. A person who is controversial for the sake of being controversial. Typically a hypocrite; creates many, many contradictions.
6. Always ends a bullshit "argument" with, "I win, so shut the fuck up." Win what, dipshits? Your opinions weren't fact in the first place.
7. Somebody that tries too hard to not be "typical" by saying they like whatever isn't the trend. Usually they listen to the likes of Animal Collective, Sigur Ros, and Interpol. (I like some of those bands too but I don't keep shoving my musical taste at a bunch of n*sync fans to try to feel a false sense of superiority) And they like anything described as "indie"; movies like Trainspotting, Donnie Darko, Requiem for A Dream, and Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas. If you said those movies were popular (which they pretty much are) they would get pissed. Basically, they're people that miss the point about actually enjoying something cause they're too caught up at trying to look cultured, therefore they are poseurs.
   
8. They congregate at Starbucks because without adequate shot of caffeine, which is what their blood is mostly composed of, their heart rate would slow down and they will literally "freeze" to death.
9. They question, or do not believe in the existence of God, because being an atheist makes them feel rebellious, distinctive, and "smart". But, these pseudo-intellectuals believe in God only during the festive season, so they can upgrade their cell phones and state their own independence from "mainstream" society by buying overpriced shirts from the overpriced, over-hype ugly Clot captioned "Fuck Government".
10. A pseudo-intellectual is someone who is too stupid to realize they are a pseudo-intellectual. This person is well armed with defense mechanisms, is extremely caustic and passive aggressive in the interest of protecting and preserving their delusions of grandeur. Thus, the one who engaged in "mental masturbation."
    

Wheel of Fortune with a major twist

Having said that, I will share some secrets with you lads on how to become a pseudo-intellectual. Don't be too worried, becoming a pseudo-intellectual is easier than you think!

• Read an obscure book on philosophy; something existential is always good, maybe from (Albert) Camus, (Guy) Debord, (Michel) de Montaigne, (Søren) Kierkegaard, (William) Shakespeare, (Friedrich) Nietzsche, or (Jean-Paul) Sartre; and remember the main points of the book. If you are truly pseudo, all you need to read are the Amazon.com reviews of the book. But having this obscure philosophy book in your repertoire is critical to any pseudo intellectual. Write down four or five key ‘ideas’ of the obscure philosophy book, and then work them into conversations with people. It is amazing at how easy it is to work in obscure philosophy into regular conversations with your friends and coworkers. *Read the Amazon.com reviews of a pop-culture or pop-science book once a year. Write down a few points from the book, and commit them to memory. This will keep your pseudo-status fresh. Nobody likes a pseudo intellectual who keeps bringing up the same idea over and over. You need fresh new ideas to steal and make it sound like you are well-read and smart.
• Once you have mastered someone else’s ideas and can drop them into conversations at will, learn to describe the ideas as if you find them interesting, but nothing new. A pseudo-intellectual is never impressed. Everyone else’s ideas are at best intriguing, ‘but you’re just not really sure about them.’
• Go to Hollywood and study the people there at least once in your life. These people are masters at being pseudo intellectuals, and for this they should be respected by us all. Don’t say anything when you go. Just walk around observing how the people there interact with each other. They all seem to do the minimal amount of cognitive work necessary to be considered human while spending most of their time grooming, socializing, shopping, and creating personal dramas for them to talk to each other about.
  

Try your best to hit the red line and become a member!

Some tips & warnings

Tips 1#
Give credit to authors’ ideas whenever possible. It is tempting for the pseudo-intellectual to drop cool new ideas into conversations as if they were his or her own ideas. This is not necessary, and if you do run into true intellectuals, they will know you have stolen the idea and you will look stupid. It is actually even more impressive if you can drop big author names. People are impressed by this.

Tips 2#
Never actually aspire to ‘do’ anything with your knowledge. This can set you up for crushing disappointment and ruin you in the eyes of others. A true pseudo intellectual only uses his bite-size elements of knowledge to impress, he or she does not use it to make the world a better place.

Warning 1#
Do not try your pseudo tricks on true intellectuals. They will make you look stupid very fast. If you suspect someone is a true intellectual, deflect from your own pseudo status by asking good questions. If you cannot think of good questions to ask the true intellectual, ask flattering questions about how they became so smart. You might learn a few things that you can copy and then use to sound smart with other people.

Warning 2#
Do not read too much! Reading too much can cut into your social calendar and cause you to actually become a true intellectual. You do not want to be a true intellectual because that is no fun and it can fill you with doubt. It is more fun to fake being smart and copy other peoples’ insights than to actually be smart and have to come up with your own original insights.

When you already have your grip on these, you will then become a successful mental masturbation expert or simply, a TRUE MORON. Try it!

And the Award goes to...... ALL OF US!!

But come to think of it, I do feel slightly paranoid now. I think everybody is, at their own adaptation, a pseudo-intellectual, or at least 90% of these self-proclaimed 'true intellectual, smart and cultured' people are.

"The world today doesn't make sense, so why should I paint pictures that do?"
Pablo Picasso

I am a pseudo intellectual. I am a moron.

Demm all of us!

WTF???!!!

Literally. Heh.


Next: WTH???!!!


Don't ask me, I have no freaking idea.


Dem yuh!

Weekend fixer.

This weekend was fucked up and still is. Just when you thought you'd probably have someone to be with you and spend the whole weekend together, or at least for a while, they just ignored you like you're some kind of stranger. And the best part is, they pretend like nothing happened. Like you're some kind of joke. Like you're a beggar, asking for a dime of love and attention.

You're just being overly sensitive.

Are you fucking kidding me? Try put yourself in my shoes, and walk a MILE.

Honestly I don't know why I kept on refusing to take the job at some companies, which they are willing to pay me big bucks, but I have to work until wee hours plus on the weekends. I said, no thanks, I wanna have a life, I wanna do a lot of activities for myself, I wanna go out, I wanna meet people, I wanna date a girl, I wanna fall in love, I wanna spend my weekends with people I love, not my work. I don't really care if I don't get paid $$$$$$$$$$$$$ I just want to live a LIFE, as a human, not robot.

Well congratulations, no big bucks, and no girl.

Double loser.

I need a weekend fixer. No, I'll fix it myself. Don't ask me how, or else you'll hurt yourself.



Dem yuh!