Mati hidup kembali.

Gua pun tak pasti sekarang ni gua dah semakin malas nak berfikir ataupun gua semakin malas nak berfikir.

Letih lah asyik nak berfikir.

Cuba lu orang baca tajuk entri gua. Mati hidup kembali. Apa kelancau tu? Itu tajuk lagu Butterfingers daripada album terbaru diaorang, Kembali. Senang saja cerita gua, gua nak post lagu ni kat sini, sebab gua rasa lagu ni bagus, meremang juga gua dengar lagu ni, dia ada spirit. Video dia memang sangat best lah, tak payah cerita, lu tengoklah sendiri!

Tapi tiba-tiba gua rasa macam nak sambung menulis pula. Tadi idea dah kering, sekarang macam ter-nostalgia pula teringat bibit-bibit intimasi gua dengan Butterfingers.

Butterfingers memang kenangan gua yang cukup klasik. Gua rasa selamat untuk mengaku yang Butterfingers merupakan pasukan pancaragam gitar berirama rosak yang gua paling suka. Kiranya nanti bila gua sudah jadi Top 40 Under 40, majalah Forbes atau Time interview gua, dia tanya, "Who are your all-time feveret music influence?" gua dengan selamba tutup mata sambil menguap depan laptop akan bisik, "Butterfingers."

Detik perkenalan gua: Mula-mula gua dengar band ni punya lagu masa gua Tingkatan 1 dulu. Masa tu siapa pun tak kenal band ni apa benda. Gua bukan mahu bongkak bro, sebab cousins gua yang bersama-sama menaikkan Butterfingers di awal percubaan diaorang membawa kelainan dalam industri musik. Cousins gua jugalah yang bawa poster "1.2 Milligrams" balik kampung masa malam Raya tahun 1996. Gua tengok, poster warna purple, ada tulis "Selamat Hari Raya" dan siap ada signature dari Loque, Emmet, Kadak dan Kalai. Gua memang haram tak tahu apa masa tu, gua masih dengar Di Alam Fana Cinta (gua tak ingat band apa ni). Itu jam memang tak teruja langsung dengan Butterfingers. Nama band dah macam makanan bijirin sarapan. Ye lah, macam Honey Stars, Koko Crunch, Butterfingers. Kan? Kan?

Masa tu gua di Tingkatan 1. Gua dapat masuk asrama, macam bagus lah. Gua pun bawalah kaset Butterfingers ni balik asrama, bajet nak layan pakai walkman masa nak tidur (kan gua dah cakap itu jam gua layan di alam fana cintaaaaa, engkau pula berdustaaaa....). Tup tup gua pasang, mak aih ini dah macam Nirvana ni. Hampeh!

Tapi gua layankan juga. Habis satu album. Gua tiba-tiba rasa macam terbuka minda. Gua tiba-tiba juga rasa lagu di alam fana cintaaa, engkau pula berdustaaa tu dah macam lagu Kain Pelikat nyanyian Anuar (baru sekarang saja dia letak 'Zain' kat belakang nama dia, tumpang populariti kakak dia lah kononnya). Tidakkk!

Gua pun share lah kaset ni dengan kawan-kawan geng jamming gua. Hasilnya? Sampai jahanam kaset gua semua orang pinjam. Lahanat semua kedekut taknak beli kaset baru. Tapi gua puas hati. Gua sangat puas hati walaupun kaset gua rosak, tapi fenomena Butterfingers telah menyebabkan ramai budak kat asrama gua yang tangan bangku mula menyertai revolusi bermain gitar. Walaupun mereka ini mula belajar main gitar lagu Korie & Ella - Pergilah Sayang (lagu standard bagi tangan-tangan bangku sekalian), mereka ini sebenarnya secara tidak langsung ter-inspirasi daripada gelombang Butterfingers. Nak mula belajar dengan lagu Butterfingers memang nak mampus lah. Susah bai. Gua? Gua punya first song belajar gitar lagu Hotel California bai, mana main lagu Korie, gua standard world class, tak boleh kalah. Susah memang susah sampai terleleh airmata nak memicit kord-kord tu. Tapi sekali-sekala pergi karaoke gua belasah juga lagu Pergilah Sayang tu. Biasalah, hati kaca.

Nak dipendekkan cerita (sebab kalau gua nak tulis sampai habis kisah intimasi gua dengan Butterfingers memang melalut sampai ke laut nanti, macam tengok budak-budak Malaysia main bolasepak) sepanjang karier Butterfingers, apa yang gua nampak ialah proses kematangan mereka membikin musik. Daripada 1.2 Milligrams, Butter Worth Pushful, Trancendence, Malayneum, Selamat Tinggal Dunia dan Kembali, serta empat album kompilasi kalau gua tak salah, Butterfingers sememangnya sebuah band legend yang peminat-peminat lagu rock dan indie kenal sebagai Butter sound.

Kalau nak tahu sikit-sikit lagi pasal Butterfingers, moh kita Wiki depa. Klik SINI.

Malas gua nak letak gambar. Cari sendiri.

*******
Who are your all-time feveret music influence?

Butterfingers.

Padu!

Don't Tell Anyone...

Yes this title sounds familiar. I did, in a way, use a similar title, check HERE.

However, this entry is not a sequel to the first one. In fact, nowhere related.

I wish I could write more but my hands are really weak. My whole body is weak. I gained weight a little bit this last month, but today it's really weak. Can you imagine, fat and weak? Bad combo. Heh.

Anyway (oh, I am called "Mr. Anyway" - I kinda like it though) this is something I wrote a while back, not too long ago, maybe merely a month. I kept this and wait for the right moment to publish (again, to my belief: There's no right or wrong; only consequences) and I honestly don't know if this is the right moment or not. We'll just wait for the consequences.

So here it is, as it is called,

Don't Tell Anyone


Don't tell anyone...
I walk you home every evening
And you text me every morning

Don't tell anyone...
I puff with you till we both fall
And our eyes are as red as the devil's balls

Don't tell anyone...
I am thinking of you a lot
And I'm also in your thoughts

Don't tell anyone...
I am thrilled to meet you every day
And looking forward to our date every night

Don't tell anyone...
I get fireworks in my tummy when I'm with you
And you get butterflies in your tummy too

Don't tell anyone...
I like to kiss you if I see an opening
And I know that got you spinning

Don't tell anyone...
I miss every parts of you
And I know you believe it's true

Don't tell anyone...
I want you to want me
And I need you to need me

Don't tell anyone...
I LOVE YOU for better or for worse
And believe me that's just the verse.

It's not perfect, but it's honest.

On the irony, I kinda did tell everyone, didn't I?

Santa Gone Bad!

This season of giving, is the season of forgiving.

With all due respect, Merry Christmas to the Christians.

Santa's going Warhol style...

The Love Guru

No, again, not me. I don't think I am. Well, maybe. I don't know.

See, when people say I'm The Love Guru, I just laugh. Not literally laughing, but I feel the tickling in my tummy, it's like butterfly so they say. Not proud of it, but not offended by it also.

Usually The Love Guru is someone who:

• Has/had plenty of experiences involving relationship and women (database)
  
• Has an extremely good sense in determine a workable relationship or otherwise (before it's too late)
  
• Understands the fundamentals or keys of a relationship, and women
• Is playing the game by the book, and by the real situation as well (book wise, street wise)
  

People think by being or labeled as "The Love Guru", you are perfect. You have a perfect relationship(s), you are perfectly romantic, you are always wanna be in control, you have the best women, you are very selective, you are blah blah blah.

No.

They are human too.

Here's a simple example:

A good barber, or even the best hair stylist, will have to go to someone to cut his/her hair too. Yes, if you Google, or Youtube I'm sure you'll find my statement inaccurate. To me, they wanna do it because they wanna prove something, not because they're the best. Well how do we determine "the best" anyway? It's subjective, agree?

Another one; even the best surgeon needs another surgeon to cut him/her open when they need help with it.

Sometimes, you can't do much about something and just let people help you out. I will help others out when they need it, even though I know they won't listen. It's alright, I don't charge.

Anyway, to tell you the truth, don't take advice from these three categories of which they think they are The Love Guru but they actually are not:

The Perfect world people

Guys (and women) giving advice that they have not tried or tested their own methods. They read other people's dating books, psychology books and other related works and compiled the information.
The problem: Impractical advice!

Guys bitter towards women

While there is some good advice from these guys, you will have to filter out the bitterness part. The good advice is they urge you to be confident, have that "Don't give a damn attitude."
The problem: Sometimes they pass their bitterness down to you.

Guys who are inherently insecure

Again, some of these guys have excellent advice and techniques. However, the core level they still feel that they are not good enough. Anyone giving advice to the tune of, "Guys, get her drunk. Feed her alcohol" is operating from a perspective of, "You are not good enough, so rely on the alcohol to make up for your deficiencies."
The problem: Do not become sucked into their web of weakness and insecurities.

In my case, well I rest my case for now. I don't wanna think about it.

Always remember: When you are in these kind of situations, reach for the phone and I am a dial away...

But one thing that I always believe: I believe I am destined to do GREAT things.


Dem yuh!

You go back to him,

... and I go back to black.

Oh, I love you much, it's not enough...................

Monday swing.

This is currently my favourite music video. Best if you watch it full screen.

I reckoned this will be good for y'all on a year-end Monday morning. Yep, everybody's getting pumped for holidays and whatever not.

Seriously, this video is SOFA KING AWESOME. If it's not, then something is not right with me, somewhere.

Dem yuh!

Persistent motherfucker

And that person ladies and gentlemen, is ME.

Why?

Exactly a year ago, I did write something. You wanna know the whole story check it out

HERE

After a year, a year goddamnit, I fulfilled my wish-list. It took me one year. I feel like crying now. Tahan, tahan.

Good things come in package

Well compared to my original wish-list, I couldn't settle down with the original version as it costs the pocket around 4 grand. Instead:

In this case, good things sometimes come in small package too

Six little bastards cost me a bomb shit

See how practical these things are? They can be turned into ceiling fan too.

Future birthday gifts for the three dissected warriors

Yes, it wasn't easy. Keyword: PERSISTENT.

See how persistent I can be on TOYS. How silly could that be? So, just imagine if I really want something out of this world?

Dem yuh!

Past present future

I told myself I will try my best not to be like how I was 5 years ago. I have closed the Pandora box. I won't let the monkey jump out of the bottle anymore.

When I was 21, I didn't even know what the hell I was doing.

"First, you are not trapped in your situation. You can get out of any situation you want if you are willing to take the pain of doing all the things you don't want to do - the long hard way. The fruitful way."

At 22, I had dropped out of college. I did two years of wasting time eventually trying to get my head on straight. Worked as a talent scout agent for a production house until I got myself in a terrible accident. Took me more than six months to recover. After that I tried out a business as a middleman in rubber industry, partnering with another friend. Woke up 6 a.m. every morning, drove all the way to Bentong, Pahang and groping the smelly-acidic raw rubber for living. Shittiest job ever but paid double what talent scout did. Unfortunately our store where we kept the rubber was broken one night and everything was stolen. There goes my 20 grand capital. Painful. Soon after, I stopped being friends with my business partner when he stopped committing to pay the 20 grand money we borrowed from the bank. So I had to pay everything (I still am, couple years to go). Super painful. Then I tried at a Ramadhan Bazaar, selling cucur udang and dadih. For only a month. Just enough money to pay my small house rental that month, pay my bank loans, and eat. So Ramadhan ended, and I was jobless again. In between all these, I have done a few 'jobs'; enough to keep me survived and yet more than enough to put me behind bars. I did not give a shit what it was, if it paid for my goals to be met even it involves something illegal, I did it.

At 24, I was jobless again. Scraped together enough embarrassment to seek emergency help from my cousin. Got a job from him under 'close probation and supervision' to get me through to the end of the month. Again, the job paid enough money to sometimes eat and pay my small room rental. Trust me, it was fucking painful. But I slowly got better and better in doing my jobs.

As time went on I realized I needed to arrange my priorities again. I took few freelance jobs consistently so I could exhaust all my energies in things I need to do to be on top. I was still far behind those who had life handed to them their whole life. However, I was catching up. In time I realized it was not a chase against others but to only my own race to my goals. Kept the nose down. Chose friends carefully so I can keep on learning new things. Ignored the time wasting folk who never will amount to anything other than regular. Grew up around enough of those to realize the difference.

Now that I am 26, I had achieved no major goals yet I since I first set out. The closest thing to reaching my goals are the habits that keep me striving for my goals. And hopefully those are good habits. That is when I realized it was time to set new goal. Each time this happens it feels like starting over. Get something done, start again. In time your life becomes what you want it to be. Even those of money have to do this if their life involves learning, skill, and growth. It is not money that holds people back. Is just their own mind.

The hard part about certain situations is not everyone is told they can do and reach their goals if they just work their ass off starting RIGHT NOW. Some know it and won't work for whatever reason. They listen to that voice that says I want to chill and watch TV or I don't feel like it. Others have addictions or mental issues keeping them from growing and learning. I didn't want to be any of that. I wanted to do cool stuff, to have an interesting life, and to work in a positive way.

Hard manual labor growing up taught me that my mind would rot if I chose that kind of path. I wanted something to use my mind. Bored if not, and with boredom comes making trouble or distraction. Gotta turn that into work ethic, no choice. If there is a blaring TV or anything else, than there are other options. Options that keep one from not working to reach their goals.

Motivation is what gets you started, habit is what keeps you going.

Complacency is the womb of mediocrity. You clearly are not complacent. So do something about it in every free second of your day. All this wandering around doing not a whole lot but thinking isn’t getting you much done. It is however, giving you a taste of life many others would never have the guts to explore. Just don't stay down there too long without coming up for air.

5 years from now, I think I'll still be doing things that I love to do as long as I keep myself disciplined, persistent, proactive and dynamic. I hope I'll be able to do more good things to myself, my loved ones, my family, my friends and to humanity. The most important thing is to not give up. To not give up. To not give up.

"Never stop going for what you believe is yours."
- Stephon Marbury, NBA All-Star

Dem yuh!

Congratulations to Ami & Yaya

In a few hours, a lovely couple will tie the knot, sworn before the God to stick together through thick and thin, through best and worst, through mountains and seas, for better and for worse, to love and care for each other until the end of their lives, till death do them apart.

It's a life-long commitment between this beautiful lady (I took these pictures from her BLOG),

Cantik

Menawan

Bijak

...with this, erkkk... charming guy,

Gua speechless...

Hek.

Ha ha ha. Well I am not gonna give you any discount, not even on your wedding day, you Ass! Muahahahaha!

Ami a.k.a Ass (as in 'bontot' - ask me personally if you REALLY wanna know WHY) is one of my true friends, besides Bala who got married the other days (I was his best man). Recap sikit:

Bala & Farah

Mestilah Bala & Farah juga. Takkan salah seorang bertukar pula...

To Ami and Yaya:

Nothing else but the very best wishes to both of you.

Dari Pilah ke Manchestee...

I'll see you guys at Kolo Pilahhhhh in a couple of hours!!

Chiaww!!!!!

Heart Complication

No, no one is dying or being admitted or anything. All is well.

I wanted to write about something rather interesting.

It's about a book.

Guess if the person on the cover is me?

It's called Komplikasi Hati by cikbubi.

What's cooking about this book? You really wanna know? Alright. The book is about ME. I'm not joking.

I received this book from the author which I met a few weeks ago, and I read it.

It was written based on a true story of me, well at least from the author's side of understanding because obviously I have my own side of story. To be more precise, it's about a girl and I, and a love affair that went on for about six months until I realized it's not working out, and everything became bitter for her after that. Basically it's journal kinda novel.

I feel flattered. I do. I don't really bother if it's written about me in a good or the opposite way, obviously because I have my own side of story. I mean, the author could be wrong all over, but that's not the point. My point is, what are the chances of someone writes about you, and publish it? A book.

To cikbubi, thank you very much for spending time compiling and writing, and eventually published it. I am so sorry it didn't work out between us. Such is life.

I'll not curse on my book.

Deactivated fantasy

Hey young world.

I deactivated my Facebook account, more than a week ago. I thought it's evil. Not the act of 'deactivating the Facebook', but Facebook per se, is evil.

Actually I've deactivated it a few times already. And I activate again, and back and forth, and back an forth. Just like smoking, you started because all your friends are talking about it and they are doing it because it's so cool and you can 'meet more people' and you'll be part of the 'coolness' so you joined. Then you got hooked up, you couldn't leave it for two seconds. You meet more and more 'people' and suddenly you are part of the 'society'. As time goes by, you realized it's not really healthy, so you stopped. Then after couple days of 'withdrawal symptoms' you gave up and you smoked again. It goes around for a few times. Most people just got sucked into the web and never came back.


I felt pathetic about myself. I had about 371 friends in that Facebook, but were all of them really my friends? And, when I deleted my account, no one even noticed. Not surprising. Oh, actually, only one person noticed :) Go figure.

I think it's really funny nowadays. Why? Because:

Fantasy
You don't have to actually meet someone physically to befriended with. Virtual sex is not entirely wrong, I guess?

Relationship Hell
Adding “in a relationship with” is like putting up a billboard that reads, “Please! Hit on my boyfriend!” or “Hey guys! Stalk my girlfriend!” I’m not kidding. For some reason, twisted people see the “relationship status” as an invitation to break it as quickly as possible.

Attention
It's the best place to get the undeserved attention that you want. You share everything in it. No privacy, no discretion, no nothing. I know many would disagree and say, "I can set my privacy levels and shit." Of course that kind of negates the point, doesn’t it? But truth is, I don't care anymore.

Drama
If you have a problem with your friend, why didn’t you just tell that person? Why whine about it in your status? With friends like that....

Applications
You can play all sorts of games and applications which you have no balls to do in real life. I have apps like everyone else, and some are fun. But some apps need to be destroyed forever. How many times can a zombie bite me? Will my friend hate me if I ignore his “Best Friends Forever” request?

Unwanted Friends
Sometimes it’s a person I deleted before. Sometimes it’s a person who deleted me and now wants to be my friend again. Ermm, you got rid of me. Why would I take you back? Worst of all are the times it’s a “friend” who just wants to spy on me for someone I deleted.

Stalkers
Unless your Facebook is set to be viewable by only your friends, someone is spying on you. Guaranteed. These pages are magnets for creeps who would rather watch you through the Internet than actually talk to you in person.

One PRICELESS example

I'm sure there's many more I can write down. I'm just not gonna.

I think it's better to smoke. At least you're doing something real and if you die you can say, "hey, smoking kills," than, "hey, Facebook kills."

I feel really, really sad now. Sad because I was once sucked into this evil thing.

Mark Zuckerberg is a BILLIONAIRE, at the age of what, 24? And what are we doing now? Playing Farmville? Mafia Wars? What type of kisser are you? When are you going to get married? How sexy are you?

Give me a break!

Oh my God, I am so stressed now. Sad, stressed. Add another one and I'll shoot myself in the head.

After writing all this, I really feel like vomiting. This time, I will stand strong and not go back to that monster. We are hopelessly addicted and it will be the end of our natural lives. I guarantee if we can make it 2 weeks without it, our lives will become better in every way. One more week to go...

Dem yuh!

Dutch Armada

Armin van Buuren: Three-in-a-row World #1 DJ by DJmag.com (2007, 2008, 2009)

I haven't been to a gig like this in a long, long time. But last night was exceptional.

It was a FUCKING BOMB.

No, no, no.

It was close to a NUCLEAR DROP.

I didn't record anything, as I thought it'd be a loss to anyone who didn't go. The three-and-a-half hour set was SOFA KING AWESOME, I literally jump half of the time. Yes I know I should have jumped all the way, but:

• The place was jam-packed
• I was hungry, I easily get upset
  
• I have a retarded leg, among others
  

I had a blast. A blast.

-------
Oh, I forgot.

He recently got married on September 18, 2009 to his nine-year love affair, Erika van Thiel. I heard some girls wanna marry him, I don't know if he embraces polygamy. They are still on honeymoon.

Dem yuh!

I wish you the best, I guess?

I saw my ex-girlfriend a few nights back, at a petrol pump station.

At first, I wasn't really sure if that was her, because I thought I saw a girl with black-rimmed glasses, and I can't remember her wearing that kind of glasses, but at a glance I saw the car plate number and instantly I know it's her. I wanted to say HI to her but she ran off before she even fueling her car. Too bad.

So I went home and it kept me thinking, "Seriously, what are the chances, right? Wednesday, 2.30 in the morning, some petrol pump in town." In the end, it doesn't really matter. It's just a random coincidence. Nevertheless, I'm glad she's still alive. Heh.

Right after I got back home, I switched on my DVD player and I turned on Twilight. Why? She reminds me of Kristen Stewart in Twilight. Exactly. A resemblance of Bella Swan, physically and characteristically. I told her that last time when we were together, but unfortunately she didn't say anything about me and Rob Patt having anything in common. Bummer.

I don't think I've EVER bumped into any of my ex-girlfriends before. Weird. But fuck it, these are all nonsense, irrelevant, and taking up too much space in my brain.

Actually I wanted to post a song, to share a song. I kinda like it now, and I've been listening to it regularly for the past few weeks. And I've learned the guitar bits, and the piano bits as well. Playable.

Not that this song has anything to do with bumping out on my ex-girlfriend.

Aydan; I wish you the best, I GUESS?


Dem yuh!

Let's Get Lazy.

I have not written so-called 'poems' for a while. But a few weeks back I felt like writing one, and so I did. It's always something I wrote truly from my heart. I never had the chance to give this to that person so I thought I'm gonna post it here and tell her how I feel, because the truth is, I really don't know if it's too late for everything.

*******

Never in my life I would feel
Or think that my love will be filled with
Red, green and and everything in between
So vivid yet calming like a breezy wind
High together and low together
All is good, nothing could be better
Frizzy hair and gorgeous eyes
In my arms this beautiful lady lies
Zenith of my pursuing happiness
An end to my immemorial emptiness

Let's get lazy, let's go crazy
Another week to another week
No one else but you and me
Another week to another week.

*******

It's end of the year. I get emotional, and torn.


Dem mi!

Mental masturbation.

I received an SMS two nights ago from a friend whose apparently generous enough to have spent her time reading my 94% bullshits.

This is what she wrote to me in her SMS, in respond to my entry: Poseur? I believe the term pseudo-intellectual suits you better. I think I'm one of those too.

Self-explanatory

I laughed. Maybe I am. So I'll share with you guys a little bit about mental masturbation @ pseudo-intellectual.

Introduction: A pseudo intellectual (a term used by pseudo intellectual, instead of using a much simpler word, such as MORON) is someone who pretends to be smart, but who does not put in the work or have the actual brainpower to be considered smart.

Four signs of the pseudo-intellectual

1. Quoting
2. Going against common thought without evidence
3. Bringing up intellectualism in non-requisite situations
4. Unnecessary use of verbs and adjectives with four syllables or more

How can you tell a pseudo-intellectual?

1. One who attempts to flex intellect that does not exist within his or her own mind.
2. Can probably be found with a thesaurus in hand, while in a chat room, looking up new insults that are synonymous with "stupid" in order to boost his or her own undeserved ego.
3. Typical cases of pseudo-intellectualism involve prepubescent 15 year old that think they have everything figured out, including, but not limited to: philosophy, socioeconomic, destiny of humanity, life, religion, politics, education, and sex. Ironically, they have never quite experienced either of the aforementioned.
4. Acting "eccentric" to differentiate themselves from the masses as to seem unique, even though their kind are quite common. Then, they consistently criticizing Malaysia and its government and citizens and everything else in the country for no good reason, followed by the claim that they will move to Australia after. Someone who spends 40 minutes talking about how much they hate police, the military, the people and Malaysia in general. When asked a serious intellectual question they give a blank stare.
5. A person who is controversial for the sake of being controversial. Typically a hypocrite; creates many, many contradictions.
6. Always ends a bullshit "argument" with, "I win, so shut the fuck up." Win what, dipshits? Your opinions weren't fact in the first place.
7. Somebody that tries too hard to not be "typical" by saying they like whatever isn't the trend. Usually they listen to the likes of Animal Collective, Sigur Ros, and Interpol. (I like some of those bands too but I don't keep shoving my musical taste at a bunch of n*sync fans to try to feel a false sense of superiority) And they like anything described as "indie"; movies like Trainspotting, Donnie Darko, Requiem for A Dream, and Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas. If you said those movies were popular (which they pretty much are) they would get pissed. Basically, they're people that miss the point about actually enjoying something cause they're too caught up at trying to look cultured, therefore they are poseurs.
   
8. They congregate at Starbucks because without adequate shot of caffeine, which is what their blood is mostly composed of, their heart rate would slow down and they will literally "freeze" to death.
9. They question, or do not believe in the existence of God, because being an atheist makes them feel rebellious, distinctive, and "smart". But, these pseudo-intellectuals believe in God only during the festive season, so they can upgrade their cell phones and state their own independence from "mainstream" society by buying overpriced shirts from the overpriced, over-hype ugly Clot captioned "Fuck Government".
10. A pseudo-intellectual is someone who is too stupid to realize they are a pseudo-intellectual. This person is well armed with defense mechanisms, is extremely caustic and passive aggressive in the interest of protecting and preserving their delusions of grandeur. Thus, the one who engaged in "mental masturbation."
    

Wheel of Fortune with a major twist

Having said that, I will share some secrets with you lads on how to become a pseudo-intellectual. Don't be too worried, becoming a pseudo-intellectual is easier than you think!

• Read an obscure book on philosophy; something existential is always good, maybe from (Albert) Camus, (Guy) Debord, (Michel) de Montaigne, (Søren) Kierkegaard, (William) Shakespeare, (Friedrich) Nietzsche, or (Jean-Paul) Sartre; and remember the main points of the book. If you are truly pseudo, all you need to read are the Amazon.com reviews of the book. But having this obscure philosophy book in your repertoire is critical to any pseudo intellectual. Write down four or five key ‘ideas’ of the obscure philosophy book, and then work them into conversations with people. It is amazing at how easy it is to work in obscure philosophy into regular conversations with your friends and coworkers. *Read the Amazon.com reviews of a pop-culture or pop-science book once a year. Write down a few points from the book, and commit them to memory. This will keep your pseudo-status fresh. Nobody likes a pseudo intellectual who keeps bringing up the same idea over and over. You need fresh new ideas to steal and make it sound like you are well-read and smart.
• Once you have mastered someone else’s ideas and can drop them into conversations at will, learn to describe the ideas as if you find them interesting, but nothing new. A pseudo-intellectual is never impressed. Everyone else’s ideas are at best intriguing, ‘but you’re just not really sure about them.’
• Go to Hollywood and study the people there at least once in your life. These people are masters at being pseudo intellectuals, and for this they should be respected by us all. Don’t say anything when you go. Just walk around observing how the people there interact with each other. They all seem to do the minimal amount of cognitive work necessary to be considered human while spending most of their time grooming, socializing, shopping, and creating personal dramas for them to talk to each other about.
  

Try your best to hit the red line and become a member!

Some tips & warnings

Tips 1#
Give credit to authors’ ideas whenever possible. It is tempting for the pseudo-intellectual to drop cool new ideas into conversations as if they were his or her own ideas. This is not necessary, and if you do run into true intellectuals, they will know you have stolen the idea and you will look stupid. It is actually even more impressive if you can drop big author names. People are impressed by this.

Tips 2#
Never actually aspire to ‘do’ anything with your knowledge. This can set you up for crushing disappointment and ruin you in the eyes of others. A true pseudo intellectual only uses his bite-size elements of knowledge to impress, he or she does not use it to make the world a better place.

Warning 1#
Do not try your pseudo tricks on true intellectuals. They will make you look stupid very fast. If you suspect someone is a true intellectual, deflect from your own pseudo status by asking good questions. If you cannot think of good questions to ask the true intellectual, ask flattering questions about how they became so smart. You might learn a few things that you can copy and then use to sound smart with other people.

Warning 2#
Do not read too much! Reading too much can cut into your social calendar and cause you to actually become a true intellectual. You do not want to be a true intellectual because that is no fun and it can fill you with doubt. It is more fun to fake being smart and copy other peoples’ insights than to actually be smart and have to come up with your own original insights.

When you already have your grip on these, you will then become a successful mental masturbation expert or simply, a TRUE MORON. Try it!

And the Award goes to...... ALL OF US!!

But come to think of it, I do feel slightly paranoid now. I think everybody is, at their own adaptation, a pseudo-intellectual, or at least 90% of these self-proclaimed 'true intellectual, smart and cultured' people are.

"The world today doesn't make sense, so why should I paint pictures that do?"
Pablo Picasso

I am a pseudo intellectual. I am a moron.

Demm all of us!

MINDstyle LIFEstyle featuring Michael Lau Art Exhibition @ Zinc Art Space, Kuala Lumpur

Following the 10th anniversary celebrations of the Gardener series, Hong Kong based toy designer Michael Lau will be having his first exhibition here in Kuala Lumpur. The exhibition will be showcasing Michael Lau’s vinyl collections and paintings as well as artworks by other artists like Ron English from the MINDstyle family.

The constant Gardener

The exhibition will be opened to the public on December 11th, starting with an autograph session by Michael Lau himself. Following on, there will be exclusive releases every day throughout the exhibition. Make sure you head there early to get your hands on some exclusive Michael Lau limited edition figures.

"Who wants to play Barbie with me?"

The MINDstyle LIFEstyle featuring Michael Lau Art Exhibition will be opened to public from December 11th till December 19th at the Zinc Art Space, Lot 61 Jalan Maarof, Bangsar, 59000 Kuala Lumpur.

Dem yuh!

And for that, I, am a free, risk-taker man.

To laugh is to risk being a fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out to another is to risk involvement.
To express feelings is to risk exposing your true self.
To place your ideas, your dreams, before the crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.
To hope is to risk despair.
To try is to risk failure.
The person who risks nothing,
Does nothing, has nothing and is nothing.
They may avoid suffering and sorrow,
But they simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love or live.
Risks must be taken because, the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.
Only a person who risks is free.

- Leo Buscaglia

Risk is a funny word.

I post quotes just to look cool, trying to somehow portray to people that I READ, therefore I am "literate, cultured and liberated". I am what kids nowadays call "poseurs".

Dem yuh!

smashed

"Most human beings have an absolute and infinite capacity for taking things for granted, especially to other human beings. More accurately, to people who actually love them the most."

I am again, smashed, emotionally.


Tired of cursing.

Congrats to Bala & Farah

In about couple of hours, my boy Bala a.k.a Shahril Yaakob will end his bachelor life with the woman of his choice, Farah Wahida. Pilihan hati, bukan paksaan keluarga.

I've known him half of my life, since we were thirteen. He is a true friend to me, through ups and downs, through my hardest times, more than I was to him.

Truth is, this is really an emotional moment for me. But right now, more importantly is today his big day, a beginning to a whole new life with his partner, and for that I am very happy for him.

To Bala, I know this sounds gay more than Brokeback Mountain, but I love you, man.

Congratulations on your wedding today, and have fun to the end. I'll see you in a couple hours.

No cursing today!

WTF???!!!

Literally. Heh.


Next: WTH???!!!


Don't ask me, I have no freaking idea.


Dem yuh!

Happy Belated Birthday. Dem yuh!

I couldn't believe my blog has turned 1 year, on the 26th of November to be exact. Crajee... I even forgot about it. I didn't notice. Time flies, no?

If I were to flash back, over a year ago, I was really in a terrible shape. Everything don't seem to be working out. I didn't know what the hell I was doing. Not that I know what am I doing now anyway, but at least things are moving forward. There's a positive progress to my life.

Before I started this blog, I never write formally. I did write love letters, notes, things like that. Not even poems. I remember my cousin, Shaq told me something very valuable:

READ, WRITE, and ORGANISE.

I took that advice. And I thank him for that. I read more, I challenged myself to start writing, and even more challenging than ever, organising myself, my life.

The start was really hard. I thought about a lot of things; What if nobody reads my blog? What if my writing is weak? What if the jokes are lame? What if I stop after two hours? What if THIS? What if THAT?

So I took a step back, set my priorities, stick to my plan, challenge my own self-doubt, throw myself out of complacency and land into the new 'uncomfort zone'.

READ, WRITE, and ORGANISE.

I kept that in mind. I start.

HERE

Anyway, before I started writing about anything, I had to read or did some research on things that I wanna write about, things that matters to me and things that worth mention. I never draw any lines to what I should write about, I just write things that most of the times a reflection to what I think or what I feel or what I believe in, in different forms, different medium. Videos, pictures, songs, quotes, stories, jokes, you tell me.

Funny thing (for me) is, I was so unsure and insecure about starting a blog and write consistently. I mean, seriously, other than eat, sleep, shit, I never do anything like at least once every day. Not even jerking off. So I went to my graphic designer, Nas, and I asked him to help me to do a make-over for my blog. Like super graphics and flashes and whatnot. You know, just to make sure my readers (passers-by to be more precise) will be awed by the layout. So by that, they don't have to really read and focus on my writing.

This blog will be like a Playboy Mansion. Sexy on the outside but full with more-than-a-post-mortem-surgery bimbos. I'll be Hugh Hefner. Who doesn't like the Mansion? The Bunnies? Wow. Perfect plan. But on a second thought, I laughed at myself. Am I that dumb? I can do this. So I discontinued my plastic surgery idea.

So, here I am, after a year I posted over 250 entries. Not entirely that bad. Anyway I'm glad I started it. *pat on my own shoulder*

Maybe I should jerk-off after I posted an entry, that way it'll make more sense to my life, like some kind of ritual. Like the Hakka dance before an All-Blacks rugby match. Very inspiring.

This is more like it!

Cute chick eh?

One of the main activities

Even granny wants a piece of the cake

As usual, the result is priceless

Right now this blog probably contains 6% of knowledge but still 94% full of shits. Ha ha ha. Well done. Let's see if I can survive to the second anniversary.

CELAKA
juga.dikenali.sebagai
Dem yuh!