Thursday, June 25, 2009

Wish not granted

"Most human beings have an absolute and infinite capacity for taking things for granted, especially to other human beings. More accurately, to people who actually love them the most."

How could I not agree more?

Life was never easy, is never easy and will never be easy. To those who thinks it is easy, simple, just follow through, go with the flow and other bullshits, let me tell you one thing; It's a fucking joke.

However, that is not what I want to write about.

I want to write about one thing that always depresses me. I want to say something about people who take things for granted.

Why do I say ALWAYS?

Because just when I thought I have given, and commit, and devoted myself to others, and what you get is only some pieces of nothingness?

Every fucking time.

I'm not saying that I've always been there for other people around me, in fact a number of occasions I was not even there to do or to say anything. But not anymore. Now that I realized I have such a huge responsibilities and commitments I must stick to, I'm trying what I could, whatever I could to always be there for someone dear to me. In the middle of the night, at times I have nothing, no money, during my work hours, during my sleep, I keep myself ready to be there for them.

But I guess life is never fair.

"To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing."

I am going to stop writing. I don't know how long. Until I regained myself, pick up every pieces that has been smashed. I risked my life one too many, and thanks to nothing.

I can't help but cry, but I will wipe my tears, and hopefully, just hopefully, I will move on.

Till we meet again.


hiddie said...


i couldn't agree more. appreciate your honesty and courage to post this.

annyywwaaayyyyyy, that person does not deserve your pure heart okay. move on. im sure you'll find someone who is of your equal someday :)

i have a friend gaga-ing over your mind okayy.

oh wait, here's a message from her:

life is unfair but whatever comes your way, please be strong. Maybe without you realizing it, you’ve helped put a smile on someone else’s face and get that person through the day with your wisdom.
Please don’t stop writing, cuz the first thing I do when I come to work is open your blog and read your thoughts.

over tak? but yes, that’s what I do and that’s how I feel :)

hid: have a nice day!

Budak Nakal said...

Thanks for the kind words hiddie.

However, I'm talking about "taking things for granted" in general life.

When we don't care about other people, they will say we don't care, we don't wanna help. But when you care, they say you are being too clingy, too bossy.

It's always not good enough, not right and not welcomed, when all you want to do is to be there for them. Makes me wonder, do I have to sprinkle my heart with Black Inks?

To your friend:

Thank you very much for your words, and thank you for reading my silly stuff first thing, I am flattered. How thoughtful of you.

I can't write now, my brain and my heart is too weak. I need to rest and go out where no one knows me and just get lost.

Unless I have at least 10 different comments by 10 different people saying I should write because it makes them smile, or laugh or cry or angry or whatever feelings they wish to feel, then I will consider writing again. How about that? He he he.

Let's cast the votes now and hopefully I will write back!

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